The ideal writing café
How to perfect the experience of writing in a café.
Writing in public requires very specific things. I like to write in cafés. They’re a safe space to be lost in your thoughts. In a way, it’s the best setup for a writer’s needs – a table, a chair, a snack, a cup of tea.
But some cafés just don’t do it for me. Too much noise, too much waiter-on-your-head, too little light, too loud music, too short tables and too high chairs, uncomfortable metal chairs that are made to make you get up and leave in 20 minutes with a stiff bum. Sometimes, everything is perfect but the AC temperature is too low and you’re cold and stiff and can’t think of anything else amidst brain freeze and goosebumps. Once, I found the perfect little place where everything seemed to be just right. I settled in for a writing session but as it turns out, all the items on the menu had stuff like powdered sugar and maple syrup and honey dressing and whipped cream that dripped everywhere and made my hands sticky. There were sticky things on the table and on my face and all I wanted to do was take a shower and wipe every surface in sight. Many minute and peculiar problems crop up with every new place I visit. You find a green oasis of calm and suddenly, you’re floating as a swarm of mosquitos carries you away. It happens. Which makes me wonder – what would an ideal writing café be like?
So come, step into this invisible space. Let’s put one together ourselves.
It has to be a place where you can become invisible for hours. You want to become the observer you are in your head. So you have to slowly recede from your surroundings and become a part of the background. Waiters don’t hover around you, customers come and go without noticing how you’re staring at everyone and everything. No-one wants to take a peek at your notebook. Or screen or tissue or wherever you’ve decided to put your words down for the day. She must be a writer, they’d say with raised eyebrows. Some natural light would be nice. And medium sound is necessary because too quiet isn’t great either. You need sound that you can block out as white noise and focus on your thoughts. You don’t want to hear the other tables too well either. You just want to capture a surprising phrase or two that delights the eavesdropper in you. A nook would be nice. A place to cozy up and hide in. But nooks can sometimes confine your thoughts too, so there should also be some open space with large chairs to sink into and room to pace around when your thoughts outrun your pen and you need to physically get up and chase them. Pacing is so underrated.
Now let’s talk food. We need snacks without too many crumbs or drippy things. So dry munchies like chips and fries and cookies would be great to have on the menu. Crispy things are good for thinking (food for thought?). For wet food items, I prefer things that you can eat with one fork or spoon without needing both hands. Like a variety of pasta and bread. Along with some iced tea options for all our sipping needs because let’s face it, we’re perpetually dehydrated. And not to forget our coffee lovers – a cold brew or espresso should be on the menu too. We also need a mix of sweet and savoury food for our ample moods.
I like white walls with some colour in the decor and pattern on the furniture. Some soft, textured fabrics in curtains and cushions. The tables and chairs need to be wide and deep enough for all the spreading out we do with our things and bodies. The seat and tabletop distance should be comfortable enough to rest your elbows without slouching your back or straining your shoulders. Fabric-upholstered chairs would be good – they’re harder to clean but the most comfortable to sit on without your skin sticking to it. Let the metal furniture stay in the factories. We’re getting too industrial and pointy as it is. Round everything. Round the corners and the walls and the moulding. Outdoor and indoor seating options are always welcome. Plants, alive or dead, must be a part of the ambience. And scatter some books and lamps around. It is easy to hallucinate and fantasise in warm lighting.
Light instrumental music doesn’t interfere with writing. Plus, it can have plenty of variety to set the tone for the day. A candle and a flower on the tables are the finishing touches. And there you have it – the ideal writing café.
I’d call it, No Fuss. The No Fuss Café. Because we could all do with a little less fuss and a little more writing.